Getting dressed was a struggle
Friday morning. My legs were stiff and uncooperative. My balance was
questionable, and every time I reached for something I was sure I’d fall from my
perch on the bed and land on the floor. My frustration manifested itself in a
string of obscenities. And I spewed a fresh load of invective when I looked at
the clock and realized it had taken twenty-five minutes for me to get into my shirt,
a pair of jeans, socks and shoes.
Mom had emphysema. The
smallest tasks were struggles for her. The twenty-five minutes it took for me
to get dressed Friday was a fraction of the time it took Mom each and every
day. There had to be days when she overwhelmed by the small chores she had once
done quickly, easily and without thought. But she kept going.
My favorite picture of Mom
was taken a month before she died. She is sitting at a table, the day’s
crossword puzzle and a glass of wine before her. The plastic tube attached to
her nostrils feeds her oxygen. And Mom is smiling. It’s not the smile of
someone told to smile for the camera. Mom is smiling the smile of a person
enjoying the moment. There is a lesson in her smile.
Last week, the Pittsburgh Post-Gazette website had a
story about Ella Jane Custer, who was preparing to run in the Pittsburgh Half
Marathon. Mrs. Custer is eighty-four. A half marathon is 13.1 miles. Her agenda
for this summer includes half marathons in Wheeling, West Virginia, and
Columbus, Ohio. Last year, at the age of eighty-three, Mrs. Custer ran in a
half-marathon in Parkersburg, West Virginia, drove home to Wheeling, and ran in
a 5K that evening.
Back when I loitered at the Star Beacon’s sports desk, I had the
opportunity to talk to some Ashtabula area runners who had competed in the
Parkersburg race. The Mountain State’s topography was a challenge to each of
them. And most of those runners were no more than half Mrs. Custer’s age. There
is a lesson in her determination.
Dixie was putting his clothes
in the dryer when I got to the laundry room one recent evening. He and his wife
had lived in one of the Covenant Woods’ duplexes. She died a couple of months
ago, and he moved into an apartment.
Dixie is blind. He was the
only person in the laundry room when I got there. He ran into a problem when he
tried to turn on the dryer. Apparently the dryer door was not completely shut.
It was not opened enough that Dixie could feel it when he ran his finger along
the rim. And it was not opened enough that I could tell by looking at it. Everything
else appeared to be in order, however. On the theory that it couldn’t hurt and
might help, I opened the dryer door and shut it with authority. The
recalcitrant appliance sprang to life.
When the washer was through
with my stuff, and I was stuffing it in a dryer, Dixie asked which dryer I was
using. I told him the one on the end. “Good,” he said. “The middle one doesn’t
work very well.” From time to time Dixie went over to the dryer, opened the
door, pulled out the clothes that were dry and put them in his basket. “The
only things still in there are a couple knit shirts. They take a long time to
dry.” Once they were dry and in the basket, Dixie held the basket with his left
arm and used his right hand to guide him out of the laundry room and down the
hall to his apartment.
There is a lesson in watching him keep on keeping on.
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